May Is Mental Health Awareness Month: The Role of Pets in Our Collective Wellbeing

May is Mental Health Awareness Month, a time to bring compassion and attention to the many factors that shape our wellbeing. One relationship that deserves more recognition is the bond we share with our pets.

One of my clients recently joked, "do all of your clients treat you like a therapist?" It took me barely a second to answer, "yes, of course."

For many people, life with a dog or other companion animal is woven into our mental health. So many of us get dogs during chaotic times in our lives: divorce, after trauma, during addiction or mental health recovery, or when our kids are very young. It's easy to talk about the joy and richness that dogs can bring to our lives; it's less easy to talk about how deeply it can effect us when things go wrong, when tough behaviors arise, when we feel out of control and like bad dog parents. I meet so many of my clients at this point. Many people feel a sense of guilt or shame over their dog's behavior and the fact that they decided to ask for help. I want to use this opportunity to celebrate dog owners who ask for help!

The Pawsitives:

Pets offer a form of connection that is simple and consistent. They do not ask us to perform or explain ourselves. Their presence can create moments of relief, even on difficult days. Time spent walking, training, or simply sitting together can support mindfulness and bring attention back to the present moment.

The structure that dogs require can also be part of the healing process. Routine creates predictability, and predictability can help regulate the nervous system. Getting outside at consistent times, engaging in small training exercises, and maintaining daily care can offer a sense of momentum when motivation is low. These actions may feel small, but over time they build stability and reinforce a sense of capability.

The Not-So-Pawsitives:

It is also important to acknowledge that caring for an animal is not easy. Behavioral challenges, reactivity, puppy development, aging, and health concerns can all impact a guardian’s mental health. It is possible to feel deep love for a dog while also feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, or isolated. Both experiences can coexist.

Part of sustaining this relationship is being willing to ask for help. Support can look like working with a trainer, hiring a dog walker, enrolling in daycare, or leaning on friends and family. There is a tendency to feel like we should be able to manage everything on our own, but care is not meant to happen in isolation. Building a support system benefits both you and your dog and can create space for more sustainable progress.

It is equally important to be honest and realistic about expectations. Training is not linear, and progress does not happen on a fixed timeline. Dogs are individuals with their own needs, histories, and limits. Holding rigid expectations for yourself or your dog can add unnecessary pressure and frustration. Many of us see our dog's behavior as a reflection of ourselves. While this can be true to a certain extent, holding on to this idea is more harmful than helpful. A more effective approach is to work with what is in front of you, adjust goals as needed, and recognize that consistency matters more than perfection.

This month, I will be sharing reflections on my Instagram on the relationship between our pets and our collective mental health. This includes the ways animals support emotional wellbeing, as well as the realities and challenges that come with caring for them. My goal is to approach this conversation with nuance, evidence-based understanding, and compassion for both ends of the leash.

If you share your life with a dog, you are already part of this conversation!